英语四级5分作文修改2

2012-11-22 00:00:00 · 作者：编辑部

英语四级5分作文修改

四级待批改作文

　　With the quickening of urban life and ever-increasing pressure,people in growing numbles are suffering some mental problems,one of which is that in the public where often have witnessed a emergence of people's immoral behaviors.One day,I saw a cheat deed to the consumer with my own eyes when I was shopping in the supermaket.

　　Considering above the uncivilized deeds,those given rise to many extremely worst effects.First and foremost, such bad actions may add to the sense of mistrust among people each other in our current society.In addition,we cannot effectively bulid harmony society.Last but not least,what we fail to understand is that politeness is one of conventional virtues of Chiese culture,we need to cultivate our common humanity.

　　To imporve this present situation,it is imperative for us to increase the awareness of people that this issue is of utter significance to us.For one thing,we should appeal to our govoronments to enact strict regulations to control the problem.For annther,it is necessary to fully arouse the masses' initiative to crack this hard cut.Only in these ways can we make our society more civilized and colorful and have a briliant future.

　　作文批改如下：

　　With the quickening of urban life and ever-increasing pressure, people in growing numbles（拼写错误，改为numbers） are suffering some mental problems, one of which is that in the public where often have witnessed a emergence of people's immoral behaviors. （mental problem 是指人的心理问题，，这和在公众场合看到不道德行为无关，此外，本句语法有严重错误。）One day, I saw a cheat deed to（a salesman cheat）the consumer with my own eyes when I was shopping in the supermaket（拼写错误，改为supermarket）.

　　Considering above the uncivilized deeds, those given rise to many extremely worst effects. First and foremost, such bad actions may add to the sense of mistrust among people each other（删除）in our current society. In addition, we cannot effectively bulid（拼写错误，build）（加a）harmony(改为形容词harmonious) society. Last but not least, what we fail to understand is that politeness is one of conventional virtues of Chiese(拼写错误，Chinese) culture ,we need to cultivate our common humanity(用词不当).(Last but not least 后面也应该是影响)

　　To imporve（拼写错误，改为improve） this present situation ,it is imperative for us to increase the awareness of people (加句号)that（改为Because）this issue is of utter significance to us. For one thing, we should appeal to our govoronments(改为government) to enact strict regulations to control the problem. For annther(拼写错误，改为another),it is necessary to fully arouse the masses' initiative to crack this hard cut. Only in these ways can we make our society more civilized and colorful(加逗号) and （we will）have a briliant (拼写错误，改为brilliant)future.

　　同学你好，注意标点符号与后面的单词要空一格。你的作文中有大量的拼写错误，建议你写完作文后再检查一遍。从作文内容上来讲，你要始终牢记题目的要求，可以先列一个提纲，根据提纲再填充内容。举例很不恰当，在考试中如果举这个例子，批卷老师很有可能就不看下文了。

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